[difference]

"You know, me and Jesus, we're of the same heart.// The only thing that keeps us distant//is that I keep fuckin up."

-Indigo girls.

[imperfections]

I am falling in love
with my imperfections
The way I never get the sink really clean,
forget to check my oil,
lose my car in parking lots,
miss appointments I have written down,
am just a little late.

I am learning to love
the small bumps on my face
the big bump of my nose,
my hairless scalp,
chipped nail polish,
toes that overlap.
Learning to love
the open-ended mystery
of not knowing why

I am learning to fail
to make lists,
use my time wisely,
read the books I should.

Instead I practice inconsistency,
irrationality, forgetfulness.

Probably I should
hang my clothes neatly in the closet
all the shirts together, then the pants,
send Christmas cards, or better yet
a letter telling of
my perfect family.

But I'd rather waste time
listening to the rain,
or lying underneath my cat
learning to purr.

I used to fill every moment
with something I could
cross off later.

Perfect was
the laundry done and folded
all my papers graded
the whole truth and nothing but

Now the empty mind is what I seek
the formless shape
the strange off center
sometimes fictional
me.

----elizabeth carlson (thanks to inward/outward)

[sacrifice?]

"Let us ask God to make us true in our love, to make us sacrificial beings, for it seems to me that sacrifice is only love put into action." --Elizabeth of the Trinity

.

And I can't help but ask... Jesus said in Matthew 9:13: "I desire mercy not sacrifice."

.

I struggle with sacrifice a lot... that is, figuring out how to be empathetic and stand in solidarity when you're not considered one of the least of these. To me the question is always: How far am I supposed to take this? How much sacrifice am I really supposed to participate in?

.

Of course, when it comes to Jesus' words, I always feel as though literal action/interpretation is necessary. But is it? Particularly as I am placed in this current context of being a Protestant in a very Catholic organization... (and, while seemingly liberal Catholics, still very much about the sacrifice of Christ and therefore the sacrifice of our personal bodies/minds/spirits).

.

So I don't know what to do with it. I was told the other day: "Jesus died on the cross so we don't have to." Ok, thats mercy..not... sacrifice. That makes sense.

.

Is mercy sacrifice in itself? One definition of mercy is "the feeling that motivates compassion." So because i am a person of faith, i am merciful and because I feel mercy, I become compassionate... but someone can be compassionate without taking action, right? So is that where sacrifice comes in? We sacrifice of ourselves because we are compassionate? Last time I checked compassion was an "awareness" type of feeling.

.

This is really disjointed and it feels like a chicken/egg/who came first conversation.

.

I invite your thoughts..... please.

[lost]

A youth came in to MFP today in suicidal crisis because he didn't know where else to go.

.

THAT is the kind of agency we are.

.

Thank God.

[time]

Time is neutral. It can be used either destructively or constructively. I am coming to feel that the people of ill will have used time much more effectively than the people of good will. We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people, but for the appalling silence of the good people.

---- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.; Letter From Birmingham Jail (April 16, 1963)