[side trips]

"I took the road less traveled by and that has made all the difference"...
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That phrase takes on a whole new meaning when you stop off in the middle of no where to see some of the most beautiful things.
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God's creation?
incredible.

::write::

So, I love getting mail.

1137 S. Irolo
Los Angeles, CA
90006

write me. after august 15.

::goals and expectations::

So I was asked by a friend what my goals/expectations for this coming year are...
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simply:
-I do not set expectations because it seems silly. Rather, I am simply expectant that the things to come are going to be good and challenging.
-If I can make one kid's life better next year, I will be satisfied. That is my goal.

not-so-simply:
I don't know what this year is going to look like and I'd rather not make assumptions. Goals are hard to set for this kind of work. But for myself, I hope to gain the most from this experience... to live on the no regrets policy... and to work on my emotional boundaries. I'm really bad at holding my emotions in check. It will be a challenge to focus on keeping "their stuff" separate from "my stuff" but not in a way that makes me apathetic to the issues of homelessness and poverty. My sympathetic nature can sometimes become too empathetic which seems like it shouldn't be a bad thing, but it can be. Either way, this will be good practice for the future.

Because I'm working at a drop in resource center, we do not house the youth. Instead, our goal is to inspire and encourage the youth to build self-sufficient lives. With that said, it is my goal to inspire at least one child of God... inspire, help them realize that they are valued, and improve their life. That is my goal. I also hope to gain a lot from living simply and living in community. The skills I will gain through that experience alone will be incredibly fruitful. And lastly, to grow in my spirituality. It is my hope that I would come to discover new ways to experience God. I don't know what connects me most to God right now. Being in such a time of transition has me all over the map in a lot of areas of my life. But I'm ready to explore.
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All in all, I am ready and hopeful. Ready for a change, hopeful for growth. Ready for adventures, hopeful for experience. Ready for challenge, hopeful for inspiration.
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Rumi, the 13th century poet, once wrote, "Oh soul, you worry too much." So, I'm trying not to. Bring it on.

-we are one-

"We are one, after all, you and I.

Together we suffer, together we exist and

forever will re-create each other".

-- Pierre Teilhard Dechardin

love and journey

I received a lot of love on my birthday. And to say "a lot" would be an understatement. I felt so much love that I felt overwhelmed. Significantly overwhelmed. My tears were not of sadness, but of profound adoration for those who love me so and for those whom I love dearly. I received a lot of cards on my birthday since everyone at church knew.. and below is a poem someone quoted in a card to me.

....

These are the gifts I ask of thee, Spirit serene;

Strength for the daily task,

Courage to face the road.

Good cheer to help me

bear the traveler's load.

And for the hours of rest

that come between,

an inward joy of all things

heard and seen.

-- H. Van Dyke.

......

Let it be so.

Ariel by Sara Booth

Please god, don't let me get trapped
in one of those pastel worlds
where everything is white bread,
iceberg lettuce,
45% cotton 55% polyester,
Muzak.
I want to live copper, blue-green, burgundy

satin and sailcloth
the sea at midnight,
the sky at noon.
Don't let me live earthbound
with my eyes on my lawn
or in my neighbor's windows.
I want to soar
sail
splash
like a kite.
Let me frame the sky
and hang it on my wall.
Let me keep the mountains
in a box under my bed.
----

Amen.

courage

Right now, I could ask for nothing more than courage. People keep saying that what I'm doing takes a lot of courage. I wouldn't say I have courage. I would call it faith. Faith and hope and trust in my God that this year is going to work. That this year will be fruitful and joyous and challenging. That this year will bring new a new mindset, a new way of thinking, a strong relationship between me and God; me and humanity. It isn't courage I have, but it is courage I need. Courage to make this journey. The courage that Howard Thurman talks about in his poem....

----

Give me the courage to live!
Really live-- not merely exist.
Live dangerously,
Scorniging risk!
Live honestly,
Daring the truth--
Particularly the truth of myself!
Live resiliently--
Ever changing, ever growing, ever adapting.
Enduring the pain of change
As though 'twere the travail of birth.
Give me the courage to live,
Give me the strength to be free
And endure the burden of freedom
And the loneliness of those without chains;
Let me not be trapped by success,
Nor by failure, not pleasure, nor grief,
Nor malice, nor praise, nor remorse!

Give me the courage to go on!
Facing all that waits on the trail--
Going eagerly, joyously on,
And paying my way as I go,
Without anger or fear or regret
Taking what life gives,
Spending myself to the full,
Dead high, spirit winged, like a god--
On... on... till hte shadows draw close.
Then even when darkness shuts down,
And I go out alone as I came,
Naked and blind as I came--
Even then, gracious God, hear my prayer:
Give me the courage to live!

----

May it be so.

[Find your way home]

"Find Your Way Home" is a book written by the women of Magdalene, "a two-year residential and support community for women coming out of correctional facilities or off the street who have survived lives of abuse, prostitution and drug addiction in Nashville, TN."

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Below are quotes that I really appreciated from the book.

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"No matter where we are, we are better coming together than living separately."

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"Our journeys all start and end with God, and everything we do is a step toward our returning to wholeness. Because grace is our beginning, we are worthy of all good things."

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"Even though we may feel lonely when we cry, we are never truly alone. Our despair is part of a larger chorus howling for justice that stretches back to the prophets."

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"I find this circle is like church for me-- at least how church is supposed to feel. It feels like a loving group that is sharing a common goal, and there is no reason to try and take power or give up your voice."

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"The heart of the matter is that God is in every person and that every person should be treated accordingly, with love and respect."

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"...I'm so thankful God didn't give up on me."

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"It is not a problem to be lost. It is only a problem if you think it is impossible to find your way home."

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"What we are feeling and experiencing is not a sense of being lost but the wonder of discovering something new."

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"Finding the humor in anything is a sign of grace."

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"We need to be servants of one another, everyone with a different job."

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"Everyone is giving. Everyone is receiving."

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"...radical love can change the world."

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"The only way I can know you is if you tell me you have been in the ditch, too."

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May it be so.

{reminder}

This is my biblical mantra for next year... "Jesus said, "Don't load yoursel[f] up with equipment. Keep it simple: you are the equipment." (Luke 9:3 MSG)

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What Jesus said

serves as a reminder

or maybe even a

first

thought. He said

the words we need to hear

the words that give us

peace

love

hope

courage to go on.

What Jesus said

hits me hard

like a ton of bricks.

convicted.

Live simply, he said.

Don't load yourself

up,

he said.

What Jesus said

reminds me that I am

enough.

I am what I am,

just like

God is

what God is.

I am reminded

that I am what I

need.

No more and

certainly

no less.

Material objects are

futile.

To live a life for

Christ

all we need is to

let God be God

in us.

through us.

with us.

In God we

live and

move and

have our being.

That is more than

enough

for me to keep living

and moving

and being.

It is a reminder

to me

to love people with

my equipment.

To love people

with

all of me.

Keep it

simple,

he said. Because

you

are the equipment.