~Finding God::3~

Finding God without Church

This almost seems like a foreign concept to me. I literally have not missed more than 4 Sundays in the past few years. If I have it was because I was traveling or was in a situation where I just couldn't get to church. For most people this may seem to have become simply habit. However, I really enjoy the feeling of fellowship, of being in a faith community. There is something to it that I love and can't put into words. Now that I'm in New Zealand, I'm challenged to find God without going to church every Sunday. This morning I was going to take the bus to an Anglican Church, but couldn't figure out how to make it work, plus it is just not a good idea to travel alone in general. So as I sit here writing to you all, and listening to Taize music, I find myself struggling to find ways to remain connected to the Spirit. I journal like a mad woman, love my taize music, have beautiful scenery and can reflect... but I feel like there's something I get on Sunday mornings that can't be filled without that faith community. I will admit I haven't gotten over to see the chaplain yet, and there are groups on campus that do Bible Studies (but with names like "Christian Club" and "Student Life" I get nervous), and I'm pretty sure we have a weekly service, it's just a matter of seeking these things out. Because you find a lot of non-religious people here, there aren't churches on every corner, unlike in Elmhurst or Battle Creek. It just isn't a priority. Since I've been here I have found an Anglican, a Baptist, and a Catholic church. Anglican is my best bet, if I'm going to try. But I feel like maybe this challenge isn't supposed to be solved. Perhaps I really am supposed to find ways to seek God without a structured service once a week.

But how?

I don't know. This is going to have to be a continuous process with trying different things and learning from the successes and not-so-much-successes (because you can't relly fail at something like this). So maybe this is what Finding God is going to be about... not trying to find God in the sights and sounds of New Zealand, but in the attempt to work around not having a church service to keep me sane every week.

In recent reflections of learning how to be still, how to rest in the goodness of God, and all these other things, i found two phrases that may be helpful...

1) Rediscover simple being
2) Remember that I am created

In doing both of these, I think I could find God... :] it's just a matter of figuring out how to do these things.

Suggestions are more than welcome!

~Finding God::2~

"This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."

This is the day the Lord has made::
Today. Today is the day God has made. It isn't yesterday. It isn't tomorrow (well, my today is tomorrow for most of you at home :] but you know what I mean). It's today. This day was crafted by God. God knew that it would be beautiful in Hamilton, cloudy but warm; it would be cold and snowy in Billings; warmer than normal in Elmhurst; and cloudy and cold in Battle Creek. Enough with the weather... but this day has brought friends, fellowship, and fun, for some pain, strife, hunger and death. Nonetheless this day for me has consisted of sunshine and silly mistakes, looming thoughts of the school year beginning, and adventures coming up soon.

Let us rejoice and be glad in it::
One thing I have found out about people of cultures other than my own is how people respond when something bad happens in their life. In Guatemala, even when the poor of the poor are on the street or in the mountains living in conditions which seem unthinkable, they find joy. It could be the breeze of the hot afternoon, or the smile of a young child, or a small piece of food found. They are glad. They smile and laugh. When we went to houses to build stoves they gave us food. These Guatemalan people who have so much less than us were more than willing to give of that which they had so little. Here in New Zealand when you talk to the Kiwi's and Maori's you get this laid back feeling. Everything is "Sweet as." It's all good. You hear stories of things from their past that seem awful, but to them, its ok! It's all good. Today is a great day and that is what matters. In the Maori religion everything has a spirit and the spirits play a large role in their everyday lives.


This line reminds me to be thankful. thankful for this opportunity. Thankful for the chance to come to a place that is wonderfully beautiful. As one of my friends put it before I left... It gives me a chance to see another part of God's creation... a part that was almost unimaginable.

Today is Ash Wednesday. A day of remembering that we are human. We make mistakes. But that from dust we came, so to dust we will return. In my own twisted way, it also tells me to live my life to the fullest-which is important to remember while I'm here in NZed. If I'm going to return to dust, I have to do what I can while I'm in this human body. And as the lovely member of the Christian Club here at UW told me the other day... I am a glove, empty and lifeless without God, who is the hand. ----Ok, so it's good imagery, but her name is Co Co Wong and she gave me a tract... if you're curious, ask me about this story... it's humorous.

And for good measure: I'm giving up biting my nails for lent... oy vey

~Finding God::1~

Welp, here i am in New ZEALAND! Craziness, i know. But this whole finding God thing isn't hard, at ALL. Here's God. This is a picture from Rotorua, where we stayed for our first 4 days of our trip.

Here's the Holy Spirit. I can't say "easy enough" because it seems as though it shouldn't be that easy... but its so. amazing. The lava and hotness below the earth creates all these thermal pools so the water is above and beyond 100 C and the mud boils. It's crazy. This steam is another effect of the heat and cool air.

And for good measure.... here's Jesus... somewhere... consecrated and everything..

That's all for now... I'm too tired to think deep. But I thought you all might appreciate pictures. I'm settled in at school now and have a lot of free time until Monday, so hopefully I will start updating more frequently. If you're on facebook, check out my pictures. Some will be put on shutterfly.

peace and blessings from "The Land of the Long White Cloud."

+==to dare==+

To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself. - Soren Kierkegaard


.

+==let's go swimming==+

"Be not the slave of your own past - plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep, and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

This is in essence what I am trying to accomplish in New Zealand. My friend introduced me to this quote and it struck me. I am not going to NZ to become "adventurous" as I once imagined. I'm not going to become something I am not. I'm not going so that I can become "cooler" than I already am :]. I am going to come back with this self-respect. I'm going to find myself. Find God. Learn more about myself than I can here in Battle Creek or at Elmhurst. I will come back with new power. Power to stand up for myself. To stick to my convictions. The power to be me. I will return with an advance experience. Something that will put me ahead of others in the future. An experience that will last a lifetime. An experience that will help me with so much. I will no longer be the slave of my past- the slave of the weights that tie me down. the slave to that which I no longer wish to be.

All that which I learn, experience, and encounter will help me become who I am supposed to be.

God has plans for me in NZ. I have lots of things to get away from. Things I need to forget about. I'm tired of dealing with things I shouldn't be dealing with. I'm not growing at Elmhurst. I'm too caught up in other things to be focused. I'm at a plateau in my call. Nothing is happening. And perhaps it is. But I need a change in perspective. I need to find God. (More about this later.)

I'm going swimming. diving deep and swimming far.

Countdown: 3 days.

+==Waiting to be Revealed==+

Waiting to Be Revealed

We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit.

---e.e. cummings

+==do you have enough?==+

There are two ways to get enough: One is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire LESS.

G. K. Chesterton


As of late I have chosen to desire less.... I'm excited to get out in the real world only to make my own decisions... with my parents, as they are, it's easy to desire less, hard to hold true to that because they want me to have everything... they buy me anything and everything... so then I can desire less all I want, but they don't follow my lead.... It's probably a stupid excuse... but we'll see how it works once I'm on my own-- boy, that's a scary thought...

+== Come and Go==+

I'm no good at poetry, but here's something that is on my mind that I had to get down on paper. Here goes nothing....

Come
and Go
Come
and Go
As so oft they do
My support
My strength
My life
They say there's a season for everything
And I suppose there is.
Each one like Autumn.
Always sad to see it go.

Come
and Go
Come
and Go
Two roads converge
Only to divide
By a fork
A calling
An end to what was.
But theres always an end
And with an end comes a beginning
Another chapter in life.

Come
and Go
Come
and Go
The anger
The frustration
Which comes with the end
Where is the hope?
Why can't it be found?
It's there, I know
Hidden, though it is
Beneath the rubble of loss.

Come
and Go
Come
and Go
I want you to know
You inspire me
You always have
And you will be missed
But I have found my hope
Beyond the fork
In the bleak midwinter
In the depths of my heart