The Divine in the Canine

This guy reminds me, more than anything else, that life is not about me:

When I come home from a long day of class, I need to walk him. But the thing is, it's not that I need to walk him, rather, he needs a walk. He reminds me daily of the reverence I must hold for all of life-- G-d's creatures and creations. Milo reminds me that I need to tend to critters, humans, and living things all the same because life is meant to be cared for-- not dominated or destroyed. My dinner can wait, my sitting on the couch can wait, because Milo needs to stretch his little legs, frolic in the grass, and poop outisde. He has his own needs and since he is dependent upon us humans to take care of him, thats precisely what we have to do. Feed, walk, pet, burrow him in blankets, pet, feed, walk, pet, tuck him in.

My work in the hospital is rooted in this understanding too. Visits with patients in the hospital are not about me. They're not about what I want, where I want the conversation to go, my curiosities... Those visits are about helping the patient uncover the emotions they have pushed deep down because they're facing a life-threatening illness; or inviting the family into a conversation about how to care for the patient because they are actively dying; or brightening the patient's mood because they love to laugh and there's not much to laugh about in a hospital; or providing a sense of normalcy in a place where the patient feels everything but normal; or helping the patient suss out their regrets because they know there's not much time left.

We reflectively listen to people's stories helping to draw out of them that which they hadn't yet articulated. We help them clarify values, feelings, emotions, and beliefs. We hold the patient's hand when they're in pain, hug the mourners, and pray over the deceased. It's about meeting people where they are at and accompanying them through that moment in time.

Hospital chaplaincy is most certainly not my call. But working in this setting has helped me to better understand the ways in which I try to put myself first. Hear me though-- Self Care is really important. My last post even said so. I'm not saying we must become a martyr to others-- especially those that drain you of your resources. But if we truly believe in doing ministry that follows Jesus' teachings and actions, then we cannot look away from the marginalized, the helpless, or the stigmatized.

One of the biggest, most privileged, mistakes I have made, is assuming someone's needs. I continue to learn this lesson every time I walk into a patient's room. I try not to make any snap judgments about how I can help the patient or the family. Each person has their own set of needs that we cannot know until we ask and engage them in conversation. Listening to the heart of what someone is saying helps me to better grasp their needs. Sometimes the patient doesn't know what they need emotionally or spiritually until I draw it out of them, but I can only draw it out if I pay attention to the nuanced words or intonation in their voice. If I assume what they need, the patient will never feel heard. 

I just paused writing this post because Milo needed to go out. So we went for a walk, he did his business. When we came back and I sat back down at the computer, Milo started whining from the other room. What could he possibly need? I just took care of all his needs. 

Lo and behold, this is what he wanted. 

And now he's snoring peacefully.

                                 It's not about me.