+appalled+

I am appalled at our world.

It would cost $10 billion less to get Basic Education, water and sanitation, reproductive health for all women, and basic health and nutrition for ALL than the amount of money spent in Europe on cigarettes...

are you kidding me?

We HAVE to do something about this...

Global Priority	$U.S. Billions
Cosmetics in the United States	8
Ice cream in Europe	11
Perfumes in Europe and the United States	12
Pet foods in Europe and the United States	17
Business entertainment in Japan	35
Cigarettes in Europe	50
Alcoholic drinks in Europe	105
Narcotics drugs in the world	400
Military spending in the world	780

And compare that to what was estimated as additional costs to achieve universal access to basic social services in all developing countries:

Global Priority	$U.S. Billions
Basic education for all	6
Water and sanitation for all	9
Reproductive health for all women	12
Basic health and nutrition	13

^Source31

+comfort+

I dont know if anyone reads this anymore, but i have just a few thoughts.

I went to church this morning empty handed and came back with a purse full of literature.

Bethel UCC in Elmhurst is the most welcoming, loving, beautiful church i know. I would say this about FCCBC but I don't know what it's like to be a stranger there. I love this church. I always have. I would have done my internship with them, but I had a thing against going to a church that had JUST had an intern (the previous semester).

ANYWAY back to my story.. I get there and I always feel so welcome. Several people greet me, and not just with "hi" but with questions and the like. I met at least 5 new people today and it was fabulous. They invited me to stay for fellowship hour and to come again and to attend various events. It was such a fabulous environment. Not to mention their sanctuary is modern and simple and gorgeous.

Their pastor is able to be in a conversation kind of mode while he preaches as he stands behind the podium but leans forward to rest his arm on it.

I don't know how to describe this... maybe you too have experienced it... but its so much more comfortable than the other two church in town, even though I interned at one. (And not to say I don't like them, I just like going somewhere where I know I will be welcomed and talked to.)

I suppose that's all... A place to call home. I think I'm going to start attending there fairly regularly... but there are still a few churches in the area I would like to explore too, so we'll see how things go. Bethel has a "contemporary" service the second sunday of the month.. i should check it out... I wonder what they consider contemporary...

Oh and did I mention they're the only ONA church in Elmhurst? Superb...

This is their sanctuary at Christmas...

+Home+

Being home is hard.

After being home for a week and a half I went to Guatemala for our 09 Mission trip.

I don't know a better word than "hard." It's like everything I knew was ripped out from under me... twice.

I got to Guatemala and couldn't process. All I could think about was how much I missed NZ and how similar some of the mountainous views were. We did a drive one day that was so much like driving on the South Island... I wanted to cry.

I didn't know where to be. I wanted to be present in Guatemala and for the most part, I was... But I think this part of me that wants to be in NZ is going to remain for ages because it was such a great experience with incredible people and it just went too fast.

So then I finally got comfortable in Guatemala and we had to leave. When I had my exit interview (something we're doing for a future video), all I could talk about was community... the community that surrounded me when we were sleeping on the floor of the DFW airport... the community that surrounded me at our first night of devotions... the community that surrounded me every morning at breakfast and night at dinner... the community that took care of me when I couldn't take care of myself (for those who don't know, I got a concussion... story for a later date).... the community that played the cup game endless times and variations... the community that laughed, lived, loved, sang, built, and cried together for ten days. It was the best mission trip anyone could ask for and I was there.

But then it was gone. We talk about mountain top experiences and how we have to come down from them to continue doing our work in the world off the mountain top... but sometimes I wish we could stay... just a little longer.

So two back to back incredible experiences... how does one cope?

I want to process but I think my brain is exhausted from it... It's ok... i'm not concerned... i'll process and think about it when I need to.

But for now...

I need to let it all soak in....

and might as well mention, 24 days till I reunite myself with the third most wonderful place on the planet... Elmhurst College.

~Finding God::24~

...in Bungy Jumping...

Putting faith in a whole lot of little tubes of elastic is tough...

trusting God shouldn't be...

~Finding God::23~

I regret.

I regret a lot of things...

Not in a painstakingly awful way... I just do...

But, I have learned from them. I didn't make a mistake, I just didn't do things the way I should have. And I've learned... that's the important part, right? Let go of the past because theres nothing you can do about it now, and learn. Soak it all up and take it for what its worth.

Learn and apply.

That's all.