Lent... and then some.

Lent is approaching, and quickly, might I add. I'm looking forward to it. Lent is my favorite liturgical season. It probably started off that way because its color is purple :] However, I have learned that is it is my favorite for more than that. It is more of a depressing season. Which suitably fits my life on occasion. But this year, I have renewed hope. Hope for what is to come. Hope for what will be accomplished during Lent. Hope for what Lent will finish with. Of course, it finishes with Jesus resurrecting, leaving us in anticipation for the day He comes back. (Personally, I think it's a tricky ploy for all the conservatives to rally the troops, only to find themselves disappointed. But that's just me:])

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Lent starts with Ash Wednesday. A day when we are reminded to repent our sins, for they will be wiped from our slate so we may be refreshed and renewed by the Spirit for the season of Lent.

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Speaking of sins, I don't know if this is one, but it is something I do quite frequently and if I quit, or eased up a bit, I think my life would be SO much better. Anyway, it's this campaign called "A Complaint Free World." (Acomplaintfreeworld.org) and you wear a wristband (like the ones that say Darfur and LIVESTRONG) and then if you complain you switch it to the other wrist. However, if you can go without complaining for 21 days, they say your life will be happier. Maybe it will turn into a habit. The point of this, is that it is what I will be doing during Lent. It will be really hard with school and golf and such, but it will be a really good experience for me and I'm very excited.

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Here is the last stanza of a VERY long poem of T.S. Eliot entitled Ash Wednesday is as follows:

Blessèd sister, holy mother, spirit of the fountain, spirit of the garden,

Suffer us not to mock ourselves with falsehood

Teach us to care and not to care

Teach us to sit still

Even among these rocks,

Our peace in His will

And even among these rocks

Sister, mother

And spirit of the river, spirit of the sea,

Suffer me not to be separated

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And let my cry come unto Thee.

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I think it is beautiful and could easily be said as a prayer. My favorite line is "Teach us to sit still even among these rocks, our peace in His will..." How powerful is that? That's what it is like to be at peace with yourself and with God, when you can sit still amongst rocks and take in the nature by which you are surrounded. I long for that day.

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A last note. I was reading the monthly newsletter from my home church today. I was reading the section by our associate pastor and it reminded me of something I talked about with her once. She said in her article,

"When I was a teenager, this symbol and these words took on new meaning, as I began to experience mounting pressures and stress like never before. Now, that simple phrase turned into an assurance, “Leah, you are merely dust, and someday, you’ll be dust again.” It was a welcomed reprieve in the very real drama all teenagers live through.Now, as an adult, stress and pressure has a new tone, with weightier responsibilities. Every year, I look forward to Ash Wednesday and the invitation it brings to slow down, pare back, get real about my humanity, my mortality, and the fragile nature of life. Doing so makes the sheer brilliance and scandal
of Easter all the better, all the more tangible, all the more real. I pray that Lent and its culmination in the Easter festival will have a life changing effect on you this year. I pray that we will embrace the richness of this season."

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We are made of dust, and shall return to dust again. God even said it in Genesis 3:19. Isn't that just the most relieving thing you've ever heard? DUST. That's is ALL we are made of! And one day, we will return to that again. So, with all the pressures of school, work, friends, and relationships, doesn't it just seem silly to stress over all of it when you remember that you are simply made of dust?

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What joy there is to find in this.

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Ok, one last thing. Psalm 51 is the main reading on Ash Wednesday. I encourage you to read it. Especially vv. 10-12. Do a Lectio Divina on this passage as you enter the Lenten season. (This entry is getting too long, so I urge you to go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lectio_Divina if you don't know what Lectio Divina is.) Just try it and see how your life changes.

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Shalom to you in this new season!

So you had a bad day...

Do you ever have one of those days where it feels it would just be better to give up?

To give up and crawl in a hole and never come out?

To crawl in a hole, cry until you're sitting in a puddle?

That would be the latter half of my day today.

Let me explain.

FIRST, I had a meeting with the director of hte ministry ctr. here at school. I mean it was good. There was nothing "bad" about it but he asked questions and I couldn't answer them. I hate that. He wanted ideas as to how to improve the center or bring more diversity to it. Well, I don't have answers to those. I came here for the Niebuhr Center, so obviously I think it's fantastic. So, all I told him was that no one knows about it. But I LOVE the NC so, I don't know how to improve it yet.

Then, I was scheduled to hang out with some AMAZING UCC people from campus and we were going to go to dinner and chat. Well, it was fro m 5-7 and then I had class at 6. So I thought I'll just go hang out for 45 mins and then leave. Well, we left CAMPUS at 5 20. Caught a train. Went around the block and by the time we got there, 5:40. Great. So I ate a few chips, drank some water and drove back. Left around 5:55. Train. Fantastic. So now I'm 15 mins late for class.

Then for class.... We got last weeks papers back....

My professor told me I was completely wrong in my paper I wrote for my Movies and God class. There were three of us. He told us we were all wrong. flat. out. wrong. When we watched Passion of the Christ I didn't understand the role of Satan. And then, I didnt really feel it was necessary. I said I could have gotten the same thing out of the movie without the satan figure appearing. Well, I wrote that in my paper and apparently, according to Dr. Das, Satan frames the movie... and I was flat. out. wrong. I can't have my own opinion. What, did he talk to Mel Gibson and ask him about it? He wouldn't tell us what role satan played. He just sat back and let us talk. and then told us we were completely wrong. What kind of grading is that?

And then, of course, my faith journey notebook which has a really cool cover/back... yea the binding completely split from the paper. I dont really know how to fix that....


This wasn't meant to complain. I just hate when so many little things happen in a single day...

Why can't I be more positive and less cynical?


On the bright side I was offered the position of Co-Director of Missions for Spiritual Life Council on campus. That's the one good thing that happened today.

helping hands

So, yesterday we were walking around the mall and we had just passed the juniors section (shopping for my sister, of course) where they had music videos playing on good sized plasma tv's attatched from the ceiling. Some kid was with his parents and loooked up and said, "what size tv's are those? 22 in?" And his mother said, "No, they measure them diagonally, but either way that isn't big enough."

I've heard this before. We have a gigantuan tv in my house. It had to fill a space that was just right. In case the family was "filling a space" I can see where this wouldn't be a big deal specifically.

HOWEVER

I have a problem with materialism. I'm sure I suffer from this on occasion as well, but after growing up with it in my family, it is hard for me to be an advocate FOR it. There are people in this world that just think material possesions is all we have to work for. If we don't have hte latest greatest iPod, computer, boat, phone, house, car, then what's the point? I'll tell you what the point is... friends, family, love, joy, God, I could go on forever.

I just don't like the idea of getting things because we can. That's fine if you have the money. But there are people in this world with nothing. People who were born into poverty with no way of getting out. Children whose parent's were drug dealers and crackheads who abused or just didn't pay attention to them.

These kids are our future. If we have kids who can't get healthy because their parents were born into poverty, or kids who can't go to school because no one will take them or can take them. What is our world going to be? Kids need all the help, support and love they can get in order to survive now. And in the future.

We need to take the money we use on the less important things and use it/ put it to use where it is needed. Investing in charity, benefits, organizations, causes; working with groups and companies that help with these sorts of things.

What would life be like if money was used for good?

Imagine a better world...

hah.

This is a great quote from a Christian author. I have not read the book which it is from, nor do I know the name of it, but nevertheless it is a fantastic quote.




I have three things I'd like to say today. First, while you were sleeping last night, 30,000 kids died of starvation or diseases related to malnutrition. Second, most of you don't give a shit. What's worse is that you're more upset with the fact that I said shit than the fact that 30,000 kids died last night."

-Tony Campolo



I would safely say this speaks to the Extreme Conservative Christians. Not to label, but it does speak to that group.


I wish the world cared more.

Praise God

Praise God from whom all blessings flow,
Praise God all creatures here below.
Praise God for all that love has done,
Creator, Christ, and Spirit One.

I rarely really THINK about the words to the songs I love. This is a prime example. Short and sweet, but full of love and thanks. It's one of those little things that make you happy. Thank God for those.

For the moments that brighten your day.

For the moments when it seems like everything is ok. (Whether it is or not.)

For the moments when you seem to get along with everyone.

For the moments in which you realize all you have to do is your best.

Realizing that your best is all that matters.

The times when you realize this world sucks, but you are doing things to make it better.

The unexpected moments when you meet someone and realize there are good people in this world.

When you realize that Love does Win. Always.

That moment in the day... or maybe not even every day... when even after you've doubted your faith, or whatever you believe in, that it's still there, holding you up.


That is what brings light to my day. Knowing that I can doubt so much, but in the end it is what holds me up, keeps me going, propels me in the right direction. That's all that matters.

Right?

Is it okay knowing that I can doubt my faith SO much but then just keep going like i never did? I mean, i recognize that I doubt and question. That's what makes faith, faith. It IS what propels me deeper into it and keeps pushing me. I know in the end that I believe... after all, that's what I want to do for the rest of my life being in ministry and all...


I love that sound... The sound of "I'm going into ministry." It has such a good ring, doesn't it?

Justice, Peace, Saving the world. Someday.

We live in a time of peril, strife, hardships, and war.

We live in a time of hate, anger, murder, and injustice.

However...

We live in a world where there are people fighting for what is right. Fighting for justice. Working to make fair trade, less bombs, more peace. People who are risking their lives to bring peace and love to a community where this does not exist.


I want to be someone like that. I want to save the world somehow. I'm not talking about doing everything by myself. But to be able to make a difference in someone's life. To make a difference for one person in various different places. I love helping, making new things possible for others.

Who doesn't want this to happen? Who doesn't want to enrich the life of others? Who doesn't want war to come to peace. Wouldn't this world be better if there was just NO war, NO hurting, NO killing?

If we all worked for this, life would be amazing.



I don't know if this has a point. But I'm going to end with some lyrics.


Celtic Woman Someday Lyrics
Someday, when we are wiser
When the world's older
When we have learned
I pray someday we may yet
Live to live and let live

Someday, life will be fairer
Need will be rarer
And greed will not pay

Godspeed, this bright millenia
On it's way, let it come someday

Someday our fight will be won, and
We'll stand in the sun, in
That bright afternoon
'Til then, on days when the sun
Is gone, we'll hang on
If we wish upon the moon

There are some days, dark and bitter
Seems we haven't got a prayer
But a prayer for something better
Is the one thing we all share

Someday, when we are wiser
When the whole world is older
When we have love
And I pray someday we may yet
Live to live and one day, someday

Someday life will be fairer
Need will be rarer
And greed will not pay

Godspeed this bright millenia
Let it come
If we wish upon the moon

One day, someday....soon