Tuesday, July 26, 2011

[a litany of JVC truths]

I was asked to speak at our final JVC retreat... here is what I said...
============
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
(Road Not Taken by Robert Frost)

So here we are, at the end of the road less traveled by... For some of us it was two years ago, but for most of us, it was just a year ago we embarked on this journey that was considered by most of our friends and family this "road less traveled by."

Andrew asked me to "analyze my JVC year" and gave me a few questions which could guide this little schpeil. As I looked them over I realized that if I were to go by those, I would be standing up here talking about myself. So, I decided to take a different, more JVC-esque approach, and make this as communal as possible... with a few anecdotes here and there.

I have written a litany of what I am calling "JVC Truths" because they are things that my roommates, the wider LA community, and hopefully most of you have come to realize over this past year. So, let's get to it, shall we?

-- Finding cheap entertainment is key. For example: going to free museum days, taking advantage of the talks at local universities, hiking in the park, window shopping, sliding down your staircase in your sleeping bag. Sometimes you gotta find the kid in you.

--On that same note, if free stuff is getting handed out... YOU TAKE IT! Food, pens, bags, etc. I don’t care what it is. You.Take. it!

-- You will probably find yourself stuffing your face because you never know where or when you might get your next meal. So, why not, right?

--You know, they say that there are a few topics that are totally taboo in American society: religion, politics, and your income. In JVC you live religion, talk about politics, and make fun of your income... because you come to learn that you earn $3 an hour for work that you are TOTALLY unqualified for.

--Speaking of work... you will RARELY be prepared for everything that happens at work. AKA Expect Surprises. For example the first day of work for Dave and I... while I’m on the verge of tears because I’m so overwhelmed I could hardly see straight, there were two or three fights that broke out. Someone got kneed in the face by his girlfriend, two guys started yelling and we thought it may get physical. It was really scary and surprising!

--If your agency hands out food because you're something like a homeless center or food pantry... and you're allowed to eat it... it's a GODSEND on those days you forgot to pack a lunch or didn’t know what to make for dinner.

--Never again will you think the same about big corporations-- such as Starbucks or Bank of America-- particularly if you spend time with Brendan Carey.

--Being a JV typically means taking public transportation... and, you probably found, that riding public transportation provides you with more entertainment than a typical Friday night. One time I was riding the bus and wound up next to this woman who was listening to ringtones on her phone... except instead of your regular ringtones they were incomprehensible songs. Then she started dancing in her seat, encouraging me to sing along. There I found myself on a Thursday night bustin a move to ringtones on the bus with a woman I didn’t know. If that’s not God, I don’t know what is.

--You have SOMEHOW managed to lose the napkin Amber gave you at orientation and gone without using one for an entire YEAR because it's a waste of a tree.

--You will likely think about having a garage sale several times during the year to earn some extra cash... particularly if you want to edge out your Korean neighbors who seem to have one every.single.weekend.

-- And, of course, no one parties like JV’s party... am I right?

Now for some different, more reverent, truths.

--You get out of JVC what you put in. Time, effort, strength, and love...

--Living in community isn’t always a picnic. But when it is, it’s one helluva picnic. You know how in movies when directors want to be really fancy and look down at a family having dinner from outside the house? There were several times when the other six people of my house would be at the dinner table and I would run to the kitchen to grab something and before I would sit down, it would hit me. This is the greatest community, with the most amazing people... and I am a part of it. Sometimes it felt like it wasn’t real life... and when i realized that it was, it nearly brought tears to my eyes. every.single.time.

--You can’t fix everything... unless you have lots of money... but then you probably have a miserable life. So, as the saying goes, live simply, so that others may simply live.

--Your job transformed you in ways you never could have imagined. For some of you, you may have found a new field of work... for others, perhaps you have cultivated new passions... and for those who didn’t do either of those things,, you figured out what you REALLY don’t want to do for the rest of your life. For me, this year has meant a lot of things. But in my time at My Friends Place, a drop in center for homeless and runaway youth in Hollywood, I found a fountain of passion flowing at my feet. I entered the year assuming I would just have a neat experience at a secular non-profit. But instead, I found a place to cultivate ministry skills, got to know some really incredible kids, and had an opportunity to step out of my box every day. And for all those things, I am so grateful.

-- To go along with that, JVC isn’t about you or me. It’s about we. It’s about the collective whole. Not just our wider JVC community, but our co-workers, and our clients. It’s about finding commonalities and uniting us as one human race. After all, WE ARE (all) HUMAN.

--Healthy debating and arguing... or as we like to call it in Casa JD, Breaking Down the Issues, inevitably happens. And if your lucky, it will consume your dinner conversations... and every other conversation... and you learn to love it.

--Every experience you have had and will have shapes who you have become and who you are becoming.... and know this... you are always becoming.

--You are always.exactly.where.you.are.supposed.to.be. This phrase helped me a lot with my Spirituality during the year. There were many times when I found myself being totally not present as I struggled at work and at home. But then I remembered that God has me where She wants me at every moment. A few weeks ago I wrote my pastor an outrageous email because I was pissed and upset about work. I felt useless, worthless and ineffective. I had failed to de-escalate an argument between clients because I lacked the words to do so. In her response back to my email she said: What is God calling YOU to as you face homelessness and de-escalation? With that, I learned to constantly be present to God’s role in my life and realizing that God has called me to be right where I am.... so then the question we need to constantly be asking ourselves is: What is God calling me to right now? What do I do with that? How do I respond to that call?

--Here’s something I realized early on: People will either love you for being a JV or be absolutely confused. Learning how to talk to people and how to phrase what you are doing will make this bizarre phenomenon easier to handle.

--No matter how cheesy “Ruined for life” may sound... admit it. You totally are.

-- Lastly, JVC life is the best life. And that’s a fact.

To quote Robert Frost again,
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

“I doubted if I should ever come back.”That’s what being ruined for life is all about. We will never be the same as we were a year ago... which can be scary and hard to manage once we’re back in the “real world.” But whether your house was flooded, roommates dropped out, you hated your job, or you didn’t get along with your community, things have changed. I know my perspectives on homelessness and poverty have certainly been altered...I know that love and compassion look completely different for me now... I know that I experienced some incredibly difficult moments this year and somehow made it through, and am better for it. And I’m sure that somewhere inside of you, something has changed too. I also know that in this end of the year/final days/dis-orientation stuff that we can get pretty caught up in good-byes and well wishes... in fact.. most of us already have. And that’s ok, right? It’s all a part of our transitioning onto new and different things. But “knowing how way leads onto way,” we acknowledge that whether it’s God working in our life or just the way life works, life happens, things change, we meet incredible people, and learn along the way.

So maybe you hated your year as a JV, or maybe you loved it... but either way, be assured that you took the road less traveled by... and it is my prayer that it has made all the difference....

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